Finding Strength When You’re Bullied
Foreword
Parents and guardians are encouraged to use their discretion when deciding what to share with their children on this page.
This page includes adult bullying.
Introduction
Bullying is a painful reality that affects people of every age, background, and stage of life. It can occur in schools, workplaces, families, neighbourhoods, churches, sports clubs, online communities, and even within friendship groups. Regardless of where it takes place, bullying causes real harm. It damages confidence, creates fear, affects mental and emotional wellbeing, and can leave lasting wounds that continue long after the bullying has ended.
Bullying is not simply a disagreement or a one-time argument. It involves repeated behaviour that seeks to intimidate, control, humiliate, exclude, threaten, or harm another person. It may be physical, verbal, emotional, relational, or digital. While some forms of bullying are obvious, others are subtle and can be difficult for others to recognise. Spreading rumours, excluding someone from a group, mocking appearance or ability, manipulating friendships, or repeatedly sending hurtful messages online can all have a devastating impact.
Children and young people are often associated with bullying, but adults experience it as well. Workplace bullying, cyberbullying, discrimination, abuse of authority, and social exclusion affect many people every day. Sadly, bullying can even occur within churches or Christian communities, where people may experience gossip, manipulation, unfair criticism, or exclusion. Wherever it occurs, bullying contradicts God’s design for relationships, which is built upon love, truth, justice, kindness, and respect.
As Christians, we are called not only to avoid bullying but also to actively stand against it. Following Christ means treating every person with dignity because every individual is created in the image of God. It also means caring for those who are hurting, speaking up for those who are vulnerable, and helping to create environments where people feel safe, valued, and respected.
Responding to bullying wisely is not always easy. Victims often struggle with fear, shame, confusion, or isolation. They may wonder whether they should speak up or remain silent. Those who witness bullying may be unsure how to help. Parents, teachers, employers, church leaders, and friends all have important roles in protecting people from harm and responding appropriately when bullying occurs.
The Christian response is never to ignore bullying or excuse harmful behaviour. Instead, we are called to combine compassion with wisdom, courage with humility, and truth with love. This includes supporting those who have been hurt, encouraging accountability for those responsible, and seeking justice alongside opportunities for healing and restoration.
This study explores what bullying is, how it affects people, and how Christians can respond in ways that honour God while protecting those who are vulnerable and promoting healthy, respectful relationships.
Understanding Bullying
Bullying involves repeated behaviour intended to hurt, intimidate, or control another person.
It may include:
• Physical aggression.
• Verbal insults.
• Threats.
• Exclusion.
• Rumours.
• Manipulation.
• Online harassment.
Bullying is never harmless.
Its effects often extend far beyond the immediate situation.
Every Person Has Value
The Christian faith teaches that every human being possesses inherent dignity.
• Age.
• Ability.
• Appearance.
• Background.
• Race.
• Culture.
• Social status.
None of these determine a person’s worth.
Every individual deserves respect and compassion.
Recognising this truth changes how we treat others.
The Different Forms of Bullying
Bullying is not always physical.
It may be:
• Verbal.
• Emotional.
• Psychological.
• Relational.
• Digital.
• Financial.
• Spiritual.
Understanding these different forms helps us recognise behaviour that might otherwise remain unnoticed.
Cyberbullying
Technology has created new opportunities for bullying.
• Social media.
• Messaging apps.
• Online gaming.
• Emails.
• Photographs.
• Anonymous accounts.
Because digital communication is constant, victims may feel there is no escape.
Christians should use technology responsibly, speaking with kindness and refusing to participate in online abuse.
See more on our Cyberbullying page.
The Effects of Bullying
Bullying can affect every area of life.
• Confidence.
• Education.
• Work performance.
• Relationships.
• Mental wellbeing.
• Physical health.
• Faith.
People may experience:
• Anxiety.
• Loneliness.
• Fear.
• Sleep problems.
• Low self-esteem.
• Withdrawal.
The effects should never be dismissed.
Speaking Up Is Important
Many victims remain silent because they fear:
• Being ignored.
• Making things worse.
• Embarrassment.
• Retaliation.
• Being blamed.
Speaking to a trusted adult, teacher, employer, church leader, parent, or friend is often an important first step.
Seeking help demonstrates courage rather than weakness.
Supporting Those Who Are Bullied
If someone shares their experience:
• Listen carefully.
• Believe them.
• Take concerns seriously.
• Avoid judgement.
• Offer practical support.
• Remain patient.
Sometimes simply knowing someone cares brings significant comfort.
Standing Up for Others
Bystanders play an important role.
Silence can unintentionally allow bullying to continue.
Standing alongside someone who is being mistreated may involve:
Reporting concerns.
Offering friendship.
Refusing to join harmful behaviour.
Encouraging appropriate support.
Wisdom and personal safety should always guide how we respond.
Responding Without Revenge
Being hurt naturally creates anger.
However, revenge rarely brings healing.
Christians are encouraged to pursue justice rather than retaliation.
Seeking appropriate support, reporting wrongdoing, and establishing healthy boundaries are constructive responses.
Forgiveness and accountability can exist together.
Healthy Boundaries
Responding with love does not require accepting continued abuse.
Healthy boundaries protect wellbeing.
In some situations this may involve:
• Blocking online contact.
• Changing routines.
• Reporting behaviour.
• Seeking mediation.
• Limiting interaction.
Boundaries allow healing while maintaining dignity.
The Role of Parents
Parents should create environments where children feel safe discussing bullying.
• Listen calmly.
• Take concerns seriously.
• Communicate with schools.
• Encourage confidence.
• Teach healthy friendships.
Children benefit when adults respond with wisdom rather than panic.
Schools and Colleges
Educational settings have a responsibility to create safe learning environments.
• Teachers.
• Pastoral staff.
• School leaders.
• Governors.
• Parents.
• Students.
Everyone contributes to healthy school culture.
Reporting bullying helps schools protect vulnerable students.
Bullying in the Workplace
Adults may experience bullying through:
• Intimidation.
• Humiliation.
• Exclusion.
• Unfair criticism.
• Misuse of authority.
Employers should promote respectful workplaces where concerns can be reported safely.
Professional advice may sometimes be appropriate.
Bullying Within Churches
Sadly, bullying may occasionally occur within Christian communities.
• Gossip.
• Manipulation.
• Exclusion.
• Misuse of leadership.
• Harsh criticism.
These behaviours contradict Christ’s example.
Churches should promote accountability, compassion, humility, and healthy leadership.
Forgiveness and Healing
Forgiveness is often part of healing.
However, forgiveness does not remove responsibility for harmful actions.
Neither does it require placing yourself back into unsafe situations.
Healing often involves:
• Time.
• Support.
• Prayer.
• Wise counsel.
Professional help where appropriate.
God desires restoration while also valuing justice and protection.
Becoming a Person Who Builds Others Up
Every Christian can help create safer communities.
• Speak encouragement.
• Welcome newcomers.
• Celebrate others.
• Refuse gossip.
• Challenge unkindness.
• Show compassion.
Small daily choices shape healthier relationships.
Finding Identity in Christ
Bullies often attack confidence and identity.
Our true value is not determined by:
• Other people’s opinions.
• Popularity.
• Appearance.
• Success.
• Social status.
God’s love provides a secure foundation that cannot be taken away by the words or actions of others.
Hope After Bullying
Healing takes time.
Confidence can be rebuilt.
Relationships can be restored.
Communities can change.
God continues working even through painful experiences.
No one should believe that bullying defines their future.
Hope remains possible.
Conclusion
Bullying is a serious issue that affects individuals, families, schools, workplaces, churches, and communities. It causes genuine pain and can leave lasting emotional, psychological, and spiritual wounds. Yet bullying does not have the final word. Through compassionate support, wise action, healthy boundaries, and a commitment to justice, healing and restoration are possible.
As Christians, we are called to reflect the love and character of Christ in every relationship. This means treating others with dignity, refusing to participate in harmful behaviour, standing alongside those who are vulnerable, and speaking truth with kindness. It also means recognising that forgiveness and accountability are not opposites. Harmful behaviour should never be ignored, and protecting people from abuse is an expression of genuine love.
If you have experienced bullying, remember that your worth is not determined by the cruelty of others. Your identity is found in the God who knows you completely, loves you deeply, and walks beside you through every trial. Healing may take time, but you do not have to face the journey alone. Family, friends, church communities, and professional support can all play important roles in recovery.
May we become people who build others up rather than tear them down. May our words bring encouragement instead of harm, our actions demonstrate compassion instead of cruelty, and our communities become places where every person is welcomed, respected, protected, and valued.
14-Day Bible Reading Plan: Bullying
Day 1: Every Person Has Value
Reading: Genesis 1:26–31; Psalm 139:1–18
Day 2: God Is Our Refuge
Reading: Psalm 46; Psalm 91
Day 3: Responding with Wisdom
Reading: Proverbs 15:1–7; James 1:19–27
Day 4: Loving Your Neighbour
Reading: Luke 10:25–37; Romans 12:9–21
Day 5: Speaking Words That Build Up
Reading: Ephesians 4:25–32; Colossians 4:2–6
Day 6: Courage in Difficult Times
Reading: Joshua 1:1–9; Isaiah 41:10–13
Day 7: Trusting God When You Feel Alone
Reading: Psalm 27; Psalm 121
Day 8: Forgiveness and Justice
Reading: Matthew 18:21–35; Micah 6:6–8
Day 9: Caring for Those Who Are Hurting
Reading: Galatians 6:1–10; Hebrews 10:19–25
Day 10: Living with Integrity
Reading: Philippians 2:1–16; Titus 2:1–8
Day 11: Overcoming Evil with Good
Reading: Romans 12:9–21; 1 Peter 2:11–25
Day 12: Finding Peace in Christ
Reading: John 14:1–27; Philippians 4:4–9
Day 13: Strength for the Journey
Reading: Isaiah 40:27–31; James 1:2–12
Day 14: Hope and Restoration
Reading: Revelation 21:1–7; 2 Corinthians 1:3–7
Reflection
Bullying can leave deep wounds, but it does not define your value or determine your future. Whether you have experienced bullying personally, witnessed someone else being mistreated, or are seeking to help a child, friend, or colleague, remember that every act of kindness, courage, and compassion can make a meaningful difference. God calls His people to be peacemakers, protectors of the vulnerable, and voices of hope in situations where fear and cruelty have taken root.
Take time to reflect on these questions:
• How do my words and actions affect the people around me each day?
• Am I willing to stand alongside someone who is being bullied or excluded?
• Are there unhealthy relationships or situations where I need to establish wise boundaries?
• If I have been hurt by bullying, have I sought support from trusted people who can help me heal?
• How can I contribute to making my school, workplace, church, or community a safer and more welcoming place?
• In what practical ways can I demonstrate Christ’s love to someone who feels lonely, rejected, or overlooked?
Healing from bullying is often a gradual journey, but it is a journey that does not have to be travelled alone. God offers strength for the weary, comfort for the hurting, and hope for those who feel discouraged. As you continue to trust Him and surround yourself with wise, supportive people, may you discover renewed confidence, lasting peace, and the assurance that you are deeply loved, wonderfully valued, and never forgotten.
Children bullied because of faith
https://www.theguardian.com/education/2008/nov/17/bullying-faith
Adult / Parents/ Guardians Links
Bullying and harassment in charities: charity and employment law responsibilities https://www.farrer.co.uk/news-and-insights/bullying-and-harassment-in-charities-charity-and-employment-law-responsibilities
Samaritans https://www.samaritans.org
Governors For Schools https://governorsforschools.org.uk/learning-and-events/campaigns/boards-against-bullying/anti-bullying-organisations
Internet Watch Foundation https://www.iwf.org.uk/about-us
Baptists Together Supporting those who have experienced abuse https://www.baptist.org.uk/Groups/330137/Supporting_those_who.aspx
Film& TV Charity https://filmtvcharity.org.uk/get-support/problems-at-work/bullying-and-harassment
Mental Health For Wales
Youth Links
Safer Internet https://saferinternet.org.uk
Young Minds https://www.youngminds.org.uk
Alumina https://www.selfharm.co.uk
NSPCC https://www.nspcc.org.uk
CEOP Education https://www.ceopeducation.co.uk
Kidscape https://www.kidscape.org.uk
Anti-bullying Alliance https://anti-bullyingalliance.org.uk
Children Society https://www.childrenssociety.org.uk/what-we-do
Childline https://www.childline.org.uk
National Bullying Helpline https://www.nationalbullyinghelpline.co.uk/contact.html
Teens Health https://www.stopbullying.gov/bullying/warning-signs
For Those Outside The UK
Australia -The Australian Human Rights https://humanrights.gov.au
Alanta – Alatnta Childcare Education Institute https://www.cceionline.com/types-of-bullying-how-to-recognize-and-stop-bullying-in-the-classroom-2/#:~:text=The%20four%20most%20common%20types,verbal%2C%20relational%2C%20and%20cyberbullying.
USA – Stop bullying GOV https://www.stopbullying.gov/bullying/warning-signs
Los Angeles Pacer https://www.pacer.org/bullying/
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